the pigeons on the porch

i've told you about these guys before. ever since i've lived here, the porch has not been for humans. the porch (which is really a balcony but "pigeons on the balcony" doesn't have the same alliterative ring, and i'll always ditch truth for alliteration) is primarily for the pigeons. at first, i was thrilled to have a set of eggs in the cardboard box someone put out there. "oooh! look at how the pigeons love it! i've made such a hospitable environment! i'm like snow white!" (even though i didn't do anything.)

then i wanted the porch to be for humans because it's nice to open up the doors and kick it outside and stuff. but another pigeon decided to lay another pair of eggs. okay, fine, these ones will hatch, the birds will grow up and fly away, THEN i'll have the porch be for humans.

but those eggs grew up to be the GROSSEST, MOST ANNOYING pigeons that have ever lived. they have these disgusting growths on the sides of their faces, and their feathers aren't precisely healthy looking, and i don't think they can fly. they're definitely sick. i would feel bad except they're cruel birds. when healthy pigeons come to the porch, the sick ones start fighting with them and violently grabbing food out of their mouths. the sick ones make this bizarre screeching noise when they're doing it, too...like a squawk but at a high pitch and a scratchy throat. oh my god, it's terrible. whenever they start doing it, i angrily knock on the window to shut'em up.

i don't know what to do about them. i don't want them here anymore, but i don't think they can go anywhere cuz i'm fairly certain they can't fly. the other day, they hardly made any noise and just sat on these towels...i think they're dying. ew, what would i do with dead pigeons on the porch? ew ew ew.

disgusting. 

p.s. we're going to sangkhlaburi this weekend. i'm pumped. see you on sunday night, internetz.

aerobics

you know how i'm pretty bad at aerobics in the states? well, i spose you'd only know that if you went to an aerobics class with me at school, but you can guess. you've met me. you know how klutzy i am. i don't think anyone's ever said "hey, you know that graceful and coordinated girl nicki arnold? man, she really knows how to do aerobics."

i'm even worse at thai aerobics. holy crap.

maddy and i had both seen this group of people doing aerobics in town, so we decided to go check it out today. we got to the area just as everyone was arriving, and a group of women closest to the stage where the instructor was said of course we could join (i'm putting words their head nods). the music started and it was that crazy fast thai musci that i dislike but've grown used to.

but that doesn't change how insanely fast it was. i couldn't even do moves properly. the instructor--a thai version of the gaily gay aerobics instructor--lead us through seven or eight different sequences and i didn't catch a single one. after about half an hour of trying really hard at following this guy, i finally looked over at maddy and we just started laughing and making fun of ourselves. even she couldn't catch it, and she's been dancing since she was a baby. i had no idea what was going on, but all these thai ladies around us (and the adorably passionate old man in the front) had the routine down. bitches.


i have no hopes of ever being as coordinated as the instructor or the very fit ladies in front, but my aspirations include wiping the confused look off my face and getting a good ab workout from laughing.

mlia

average things i've gotten so used to in my life that i didn't realize i should blog about them:

• my hard-as-a-rock bed
• one or two geckos in my room at all times, making their distinct gecko noises
• stray ants wandering on my bed, my computer, my desk at school, etc.
• constant bug bites (though i have to give a shout out to maddy here, who deals with more bug bites than anyone i know...brave girl)
• cold showers (it might be a hot country, but my apartment has air conditioning so i'm actually cool most of the time, and i'd really like just one steaming hot shower.)
• a terribly slow internet connection that kicks me off/stops working at random
• locking myself out of my apartment (though everyone who's ever lived with me knows i do this fairly often. also, it seems that when you make a complete fool of yourself, thai people like you better, so the front desk ladies and i are getting along better and better with the passing of time.)
• shouting in the classroom
• being shocked at a dead quiet classroom
• teaching 40+ students at a time
• eating at one of the same three restaurants almost every night of the week (i have no stove, oven, or even toaster oven, though the last is subject to change).
• asking the question, "where do you want to go for break?" and legitimately getting the answer, "i dunno...we could go to malaysia or vietnam or another island..." (i'm sorry, this was a really annoying bullet, but i felt like all of my other ones were really complainy, so i thought i'd toss in this uppity one just to spice things up.)
• taking minivans everywhere
• missing family/friends/america
• the gloriousness of the fresh food market in town
• song taus, suphan's closest semblance of a public transportation system (though someday soon, i'll get to a full post on this)

things i have not gotten used to in my life and will merit a full, ranty blog post later:

• THE DISGUSTING, NOISY PIGEONS OUTSIDE ON MY PORCH