the pigeons on the porch

i've told you about these guys before. ever since i've lived here, the porch has not been for humans. the porch (which is really a balcony but "pigeons on the balcony" doesn't have the same alliterative ring, and i'll always ditch truth for alliteration) is primarily for the pigeons. at first, i was thrilled to have a set of eggs in the cardboard box someone put out there. "oooh! look at how the pigeons love it! i've made such a hospitable environment! i'm like snow white!" (even though i didn't do anything.)

then i wanted the porch to be for humans because it's nice to open up the doors and kick it outside and stuff. but another pigeon decided to lay another pair of eggs. okay, fine, these ones will hatch, the birds will grow up and fly away, THEN i'll have the porch be for humans.

but those eggs grew up to be the GROSSEST, MOST ANNOYING pigeons that have ever lived. they have these disgusting growths on the sides of their faces, and their feathers aren't precisely healthy looking, and i don't think they can fly. they're definitely sick. i would feel bad except they're cruel birds. when healthy pigeons come to the porch, the sick ones start fighting with them and violently grabbing food out of their mouths. the sick ones make this bizarre screeching noise when they're doing it, too...like a squawk but at a high pitch and a scratchy throat. oh my god, it's terrible. whenever they start doing it, i angrily knock on the window to shut'em up.

i don't know what to do about them. i don't want them here anymore, but i don't think they can go anywhere cuz i'm fairly certain they can't fly. the other day, they hardly made any noise and just sat on these towels...i think they're dying. ew, what would i do with dead pigeons on the porch? ew ew ew.

disgusting. 

p.s. we're going to sangkhlaburi this weekend. i'm pumped. see you on sunday night, internetz.

aerobics

you know how i'm pretty bad at aerobics in the states? well, i spose you'd only know that if you went to an aerobics class with me at school, but you can guess. you've met me. you know how klutzy i am. i don't think anyone's ever said "hey, you know that graceful and coordinated girl nicki arnold? man, she really knows how to do aerobics."

i'm even worse at thai aerobics. holy crap.

maddy and i had both seen this group of people doing aerobics in town, so we decided to go check it out today. we got to the area just as everyone was arriving, and a group of women closest to the stage where the instructor was said of course we could join (i'm putting words their head nods). the music started and it was that crazy fast thai musci that i dislike but've grown used to.

but that doesn't change how insanely fast it was. i couldn't even do moves properly. the instructor--a thai version of the gaily gay aerobics instructor--lead us through seven or eight different sequences and i didn't catch a single one. after about half an hour of trying really hard at following this guy, i finally looked over at maddy and we just started laughing and making fun of ourselves. even she couldn't catch it, and she's been dancing since she was a baby. i had no idea what was going on, but all these thai ladies around us (and the adorably passionate old man in the front) had the routine down. bitches.


i have no hopes of ever being as coordinated as the instructor or the very fit ladies in front, but my aspirations include wiping the confused look off my face and getting a good ab workout from laughing.

mlia

average things i've gotten so used to in my life that i didn't realize i should blog about them:

• my hard-as-a-rock bed
• one or two geckos in my room at all times, making their distinct gecko noises
• stray ants wandering on my bed, my computer, my desk at school, etc.
• constant bug bites (though i have to give a shout out to maddy here, who deals with more bug bites than anyone i know...brave girl)
• cold showers (it might be a hot country, but my apartment has air conditioning so i'm actually cool most of the time, and i'd really like just one steaming hot shower.)
• a terribly slow internet connection that kicks me off/stops working at random
• locking myself out of my apartment (though everyone who's ever lived with me knows i do this fairly often. also, it seems that when you make a complete fool of yourself, thai people like you better, so the front desk ladies and i are getting along better and better with the passing of time.)
• shouting in the classroom
• being shocked at a dead quiet classroom
• teaching 40+ students at a time
• eating at one of the same three restaurants almost every night of the week (i have no stove, oven, or even toaster oven, though the last is subject to change).
• asking the question, "where do you want to go for break?" and legitimately getting the answer, "i dunno...we could go to malaysia or vietnam or another island..." (i'm sorry, this was a really annoying bullet, but i felt like all of my other ones were really complainy, so i thought i'd toss in this uppity one just to spice things up.)
• taking minivans everywhere
• missing family/friends/america
• the gloriousness of the fresh food market in town
• song taus, suphan's closest semblance of a public transportation system (though someday soon, i'll get to a full post on this)

things i have not gotten used to in my life and will merit a full, ranty blog post later:

• THE DISGUSTING, NOISY PIGEONS OUTSIDE ON MY PORCH

clean clothes

i hate doing laundry. well, it's not the actual doing of the laundry--putting clothes in a big machine and pressing a couple buttons is easy. it's the post-wash & dry part that i hate. folding clothes sucks. but that part inevitably comes every single time after the laundry part, so in conclusion, i hate doing laundry.

so i started paying someone to do my laundry. about every other week, i walk down to this cute little laundry shop, drop off my basket of clothes, and a day or two later i come back to a bag of folded, clean clothes.

 

"oh, nicki, you must really be splurging on this."

60 baht. that's it. you see that big bag there? 60 baht. not even $2! hell yeah. life upgrade.

you thought the best part of my life was traveling? ha.

haircut

i'm gonna do it. this afternoon, after class, i'm gonna go to the hair salon down the street and get my hair cut. my hair's needed a trim for a while, but i've been nervous to go. you know, there's that whole language barrier thing.

i'm trying to grow my hair out (no more short hair nicki!), so i want a pretty simple cut--a trim, really. just a trim on my layers and a little feathering in the front. so easy to explain in english. but in thai? yeah, right. you think i have the word "layer" or "feather" in my vocabulary? or that "feather" even means the same thing over here?

so i found a picture of pretty much what i'm asking for. it's kristin cavaleri (or however you spell her last name), and i really super hate that whore, but she's got a nice, basic little hair cut in this picture. i printed her out, and i'll take her with me this afternoon. maddy's coming, too, so she can document and yell out if the hair stylist starts doing something really bad.

wish me luck.

POST HAIRCUT UPDATE:

well, i guess i'm not growing my hair out right now.

 

i think i match some of my students now. maybe we can bond over it?

boyfriends

i was teasing a girl in my class for talking on her phone after class started.

"who is that, your boyfriend?"
"no, mai mi! mai mi!" (i don't have one!)
"oh, surrrrrrre."

this prompted an after-class personal question from some other girls.

"teacha. you have boyfriend?"
"nope. i'm single."
"but you're beautiful!"

i know, girlfriends. if only everyone in the world were as aware of my stunning good looks as you are.

the best day in bangkok

remember how much i said i hated bangkok? i think i've just been doing it wrong.

alex, maddy, ally, sam, and i decided we wanted to see avatar this weekend, so we made plans to go this afternoon, just sort of whenever we woke up. we left yoo dee mee sook around 11:30 am and walked out to the main road to catch a song tau (suphan's form of public transportation. it's essentially a truck with two benches in the back...but the bed is covered...i dunno, hard to explain, not really important to the story). when we walked around the back of the song tau, we heard this huge "NIIICCCCCCCKKKKKKKIIIIIIII!!"

a handful of my craziest 9th graders were on the truck (including a girl who may or may not have a crush on me). hugs and high fives for everyone! god, we laughed a lot. i'm not doing the ride any justice, but it might just be one of those things that was only funny if you were there (sorry for even bringing it up, people who weren't there). just trust that it was the best song tau ride ever.

we hopped off the song tau and straight on to the minivan headed toward bangkok. an hour and a half later, around 1:30 pm, we were at victory monument, where we walked about 100 steps to the sky train station.

bangkok, i just want to commend you on the bts. it's fast, it's efficient, it's clean, it's easy to navigate, and it's got almost everything i want in a public transportation system. just make it go to the khao san/grand palace area, and then you've got it made.

anyway, about seven minutes after we got on the sky train, we got off at the siam stop for the siam paragon mall. this place is HUGE (five floors, plus a mezzazine, ground, and basement). it's pretty much like any big, fancy mall you'd see in america. think macy's, nordstroms, bloomingdales, etc. (except not those specific brands). the top floor is the hugest, nicest movie theater i've ever seen. we bought our tickets for the 2:30 pm showing of avatar in 3d and dashed down to the food floor for some grub. i hit up the bk lounge, which let me in even though i didn't have coups.

then we watched avatar and it was SO GOOD. oh man. that movie's an experience. i know i sound like everybody else in the world, but really really really, you should go see it.

tahsh joined up with us after the movie, and we had some time after the movie but before the last bus for suphan departed, so we wandered the mall. no, actually, tahsh and i spent an hour in a grocery store FILLED with imported goods--delicious cheeses, hummus, tortillas, reduced fat jiffy, and several other things i literally gasped at in the store. nat sent me some sbux coffee about two weeks ago, so i finally found a coffee press so i could enjoy. my first cup will be tomorrow morning. don't worry, i'll keep you updated.

we left the mall around 7 and after a ride on the sky train and a minivan drive, we were home in suphan by 9:30. it was glorious. i know you probably read through this and got bored to death with the stupid time updates i kept giving you, but if you've ever been to bangkok, you understand why these times are so critical to an awesome day. in a city where a one-mile cab ride can take 45 minutes, times like the ones we made today are superb.

anyway, now i'm gonna go to bed early mostly because i wanna wake up and have coffee.

NEXT MORNING UPDATE: this coffee rules. i still have to perfect my water-to-coffee-grounds ratio, but i'm more than happy that's one of my current tasks in life.  i paired said cup of coffee with a fried egg, bread w/jam, and a handful of grapes. if that's not breakfast in america, i don't know what is.